Coshcast Season 3 Ep 6: Gareth Bale is Batman
On the Coshcast this week it’s everyone’s second favourite break after the Kit-Kat. Yes, it’s the international break.
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Has United’s Re-build Gone Too Far?
Almost three months ago, I had the good fortune to be asked to write a preview for the good lads at Under The Cosh as to what I thought was going to happen during United’s summer transfer window.
Now that the hilarious and terrifying events of this summer’s business have thankfully concluded, there’s no better time to look back and see if I was right or wrong.
Welbeck Handed A Lifeline
When you assess the abilities of Giroud and Walcott, they are both half an ideal striker. If you combined the two you’d get a beautiful Franglo physical specimen with gorgeous hair, extreme quickness and 25-30 goals a season.
Time To Take Gabriel Seriously
There are times when watching Gabriel that you’d be forgiven for thinking you were watching Koscielny, save for the Brazilian’s rather Keown-esque features.
Transfer bullsh*t – who’s to blame?
As the summer transfer window thankfully starts to wind down, it’s worth reflecting on what has been a period filled with very little other than lies, speculation and click bait.
Who is to blame for all the spurious, deceptive and fraudulent stories?
Buying A Striker? Good Luck
Backup strikers at top clubs these days have to be one – if not a combination of – the following:
Relatively unambitious (Remy).
Too old to expect a first team spot (Drogba) or too young and unestablished (Wilson) to expect a first team spot.
In decline or poor form and thus understanding that they do not merit a first team place (Falcao, Soldado, Van Persie).
Willing and able to play another position in order to get game time (Walcott, Welbeck).
Coshcast Season 3 Ep 3: City’s Fake Win Over Chelsea
The Coshcast returns and we dive straight into the Premier League where City beat Chelsea 3-0 and like a young man on Maury Povich receiving a positive paternity test, Mourinho declares it a fake result.
The Year of the Rooney?
One wonders what the reaction will be once he inevitably owns the scoring record for both club and country. Will it be one of grudging respect or will these feats allow fans to realize how lucky they’ve been to see him play?
‘Teams I Hate in The Spotlight’ – Newcastle
Newcastle United – a team so desperate to be viewed as the ‘King of the North’ that they tried to marry a Stark. The most illustrious and grandest team in all of England as long as the barometer of measurement is not winning trophies.
What’s your position?
In the mid-90s had you told Romario that his primary function was to serve as a snow-blower for Luis Figo, he’d have probably knocked you out or died laughing. These days, the game’s poachers or “fox-in-the-box” types like Chicharito, Defoe and Soldado are staggering around in a daze, wondering what happened to the football they knew, and whether they’ll get a flick on from a target man ever again.
Chelsea: Someone Turan Box-to-Box
The rumours that Chelsea are one of three Premier League clubs talking to Atletico Madrid’s Arda Turan got me thinking about the potential tactical ramifications for the Blues next season. Does this spell the end for Oscar? Or at least the beginning of a more bit-part role? We […]
Juventus: A Business Case
Juventus is a well-run business, and aside from a few exceptions, a team which is being run as a business in a league in which most owners are still running theirs as fruit stands.
Coshcast Season 2 Ep 43: Women’s World Cup; Copa America; Transfers
Welcome to Episode 43! Subscribe on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/under-the-cosh-coshcast/id767743946 S2_Ep43: Women’s World Cup; Copa America; Transfers (21/06/15) Back once again like the renegade master, Brazil’s women cannot avoid disaster as they crash out of the World Cup harder than Arturo Vidal after a couple of lagers. Elsewhere, Colombia hit Bacca […]
Tottenham Hotspur: Season Review
In May, we were privileged to interview former Tottenham full-back, Paul Stalteri. When we asked him what he thought of Pochettino’s first season in charge of Spurs, he said “Hopefully they stick with the manager and don’t make another change…they need to stick with somebody for the next […]
Norwich City: Will The Canaries Soar?
Norwich City’s recent history has been turbulent. Two successive relegations saw the club drop into League 1 in 2009. Paul Lambert’s appointment and back-to-back promotions returned them to the Premiership, but losing Lambert and a disastrous Chris Hughton reign once again saw the Canaries demoted to the Championship. […]
FC Barcelona: Season Review
What Barcelona have achieved this season has been remarkable, which we discuss endlessly on our latest podcast, especially after it looked as though the club was in turmoil toward the end of 2014. Who better to help us re-live this unbelievable chapter of Blaugrana history than passionate culé, […]
Arsenal: Season Review
To me it was obvious that the team needed another experienced centrback to provide cover and competition. I also wondered why he didn’t get a proper defensive midfielder, seeing that the injury-prone Arteta’s performances had declined in the latter part of the previous season, and the fact that Flamini just isn’t a very good footballer.
Manchester United: The Reshaping Continues
If you thought last summer saw a lot of transfer activity at Old Trafford, you may want to brace yourself – now that the season is over, there is another whirlwind of activity about to get underway.
Lazio: Season Review
You couldn’t write Ogenyi Onazi – the most disappointing player for you this season – scoring the most important goal in many seasons. You couldn’t write Miroslav Klose putting gloss on the scoreline and reminding everyone of the secret behind much of our success.
Bielsa’s Marseille – Season Review
It was a season that promised to much for L’OM. A new manager with a temperament to match the city’s, a young, hungry and talented squad with a point to prove, and as always a fan-base that never shirks their duties in terms of producing an atmosphere. Everything started brilliantly. Somewhere along the line, though, the milk turned sour. To tell us more, here’s French football expert, Mohamed Mohamed. Follow him on Twitter at @MoeSquare.
Liverpool: Season Review
As we discussed on our most recent podcast, it’s been one of the most bizarre seasons in Liverpool’s recent history. After blowing the Premiership away last time around, the Reds and Brendan Rodgers have struggled for consistency and togetherness in a season punctuated by flashpoints. Balotelli being dropped, […]
Chelsea FC – The Season That “Boring” Won It All
Welcome to the first of our series of season reviews by fans of various clubs. In this installment, friend of the blog and Chelsea aficionado Jesus Martinez takes us through the remarkably smooth journey that was the Blues’ title-winning campaign. Follow Jesus on Twitter at @PP_CFC1905 You really […]
What happened to A.S. Roma?
A.S. Roma started this season like a house on fire. Their new signings had bedded in well, Rudi Garcia was the name on everybody’s lips, and it looked as though the Giallorossi would genuinely push Juventus all the way in the race for lo Scudetto. Since around the […]
Exclusive Interview: Paul Stalteri
On Saturday, April 18 Under The Cosh travelled to the Ontario Soccer Centre in Vaughan to meet Paul Stalteri. Stalteri, who retired in 2013, is Canada’s most-capped player, captained his country on 30 occasions, and was in the Canadian team that won the Gold Cup in 2000. In […]
Coshcast Season 2 Ep 34: Sherwood’s FA Cup Win Ratio
Welcome to Episode 34! Subscribe on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/under-the-cosh-coshcast/id767743946 Welcome everybody to the wild, wild west, you’ll be out of that dress when you meet our football analysis. In the FA Cup, the Emirates is often described as a library but Arsenal just about got their Reading done, and Tim […]
Matchday 33: Mourinho vs Van Gaal…again.
The TV scheduling gods have royally screwed up this weekend. Chelsea against Manchester United is clearly the biggest fixture, but it’s being played at the same time as Arsenal’s FA Cup semi-final against Reading. What kind of nonsense is that? Never mind. There are also a few other […]
Coshcast Season 2 Ep 33: Demolition Manchester Derby
Welcome to Episode 33! Subscribe on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/under-the-cosh-coshcast/id767743946 This week on the Coshcast, United tie City up and whip them harder than Anastasia Steele, while Sherwood and Pardew compete for best cockney manager award as both their sides win again. In La Liga, Barcelona drop points while in Seria […]
Matchday 32: The Manchester Derby
The season is grinding its way to a dramatic conclusion, at least where the top four and relegation battles are concerned. It will take multiple Gerrard-esque slips for Chelsea concede the title now, but beneath them, Arsenal, City and United are battling it out to decide which of the top four spots each get.
Alain de Pardieux, Pardiola, Pardz
So why does Pardew not get the credit he deserves? The man has a reputation problem. The problem is that he has the reputation of being an absolute bell-end.
Gaffer to replace Jeremy Clarkson?
So, after investigation, we learn that the BBC will not be renewing Jeremy Clarkson’s contract. The rest of this season of Top Gear will play out, and then the BBC and the show’s team will figure how – or whether – to continue their work. There are parallels […]
Arsène’s Successor: Navigating the Minefield
Watching Arsenal in the Champions League is much akin to going to an extremely good strip club (I’d imagine). They are sexy and exciting, exotic and enticing, and yet after you’ve spent a good deal of money to watch them for an hour and a half, you are likely to be left achingly frustrated.
A Curious Couple: S.S. Lazio & Ravel Morrison
After a few seasons bouncing around the Championship on more loans than the Greek economy, failing at each club and facing criminal charges on multiple occasions, he is being rewarded with a four year deal at one of Italy’s most prestigious clubs. How has this happened?
£5.14bn to watch Armand Traore?
We love it too much. It doesn’t take many instances of dragging a laptop over a sleeping partner at 7am Eastern after four hours’ sleep to realize that one is a slave to the game.
The Bundesliga Returns: Five Things to Keep an Eye On
The Bundesliga returns to us this weekend after what felt like an incredibly long winter break, and while it’s been nice not to have to report Dortmund 1-0 losses each week, we’re pretty happy to have it back. In this piece, German football expert Adrian Sertl tells us what […]
Au Revoir, Arrivederci, Sod Off
Ah, the January transfer window. A time for rumour, a time for tabloid hacks, a time for your mate’s uncle who works at a barber shop who cut the hair of Anton Ferdinand’s cousin to tell you that QPR are considering ‘raiding’ New York Red Bulls to reunite […]
Martinez & Everton: Patience or Panic?
After a poor first half of the season, it would seem that Everton fans are split on whether to retain faith in Roberto Martinez. I think it is an interesting case, so let’s take a look at it. Martinez took over as Everton manager at the beginning of […]
Patience, Injuries & Poor Defending
As we near the midway point of the 2014/15 Premier League season, let’s take a look at some of the major themes so far. Patience At time of writing, this is the furthest into a season we’ve got in 18 years without seeing a manager get sacked. It […]
Real Moyesiedad
At first, David Moyes as manager of Real Sociedad sits a little uncomfortably. It’s like when your first girlfriend asks you to stop wearing baggy clothes and buys you a tight-fitting t-shirt. You’re a little bemused, you can’t immediately see what the benefit is, but over time you […]
Tottenham: Time to Take the Long View
I’ve mentioned before on the Coshcast that my Dad – or ‘Old Cosher’ – is a long-suffering Tottenham fan. From the glory of winning the league and cup double in the early 60s to the doldrums of the Taricco-infected 90s, he’s seen it all. After Spurs’ defeat to […]
Borussia Dortmund’s Fall from Grace
What on earth has happened to previously high-flying Dortmund, this season? Ahead of their massive clash with Bayern Munich this weekend, Adrian Sertl breaks it down for us: Follow Adrian on Twitter at @AdrianSertl for excellent Bundesliga coverage and more. To say that Borussia Dortmund’s current Bundesliga campaign […]
In Praise of the South American Imagination
We not-so-subtly dedicated our most recent podcast to the Premiership’s Spanish-speaking players that dominated last weekend’s headlines. Since its inception in 1992, the Premier League has had its fair share of exciting South American players. Growing up in the 90s and early 2000s, I was privileged to watch […]
An Ode to the International Break
On our recent Podcast we complained about the international break. So as a form of therapy, I came up with a poem to sooth my soul. Enjoy. It comes out of nowhere, like it does every year It startles us with its coming and moves us nearly to […]
Wayne Rooney – Captain Immaterial
It was inevitable, really, wasn’t it? As sure as Sepp Blatter’s three re-elections, as sure as Daniel Levy’s sacking of Tim Sherwood, as sure as Messi winning the Golden Ball at this summer’s World Cup…Wayne Rooney would be named captain of Manchester United. Admittedly, there is a defence […]
James Rodriguez – Flavour of the Month
On our last podcast, Rishay said about Real Madrid: “for a Champions League winning side, I think they’re doing too much in the transfer window, this time”. I think he’s right. Hark back for a minute to the summer of 2003, when Real Madrid president Florentino Perez decided […]
Finally, I can support England again
It was June 26, 1996. England were playing Germany at Wembley in the semi-finals of the European Championships. I had bet my grandfather 10 pence that Germany would score first. Not a huge gamble in hindsight, but at eight years old it seemed like a fairly big deal. […]
Coshcast Ep 24: World Cup #TO14
Welcome to Episode 24 of the Coshcast! Subscribe on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/under-the-cosh-coshcast/id767743946 We’re a week closer to the World Cup and like FIFA’s propensity for corruption, the Coshcast never stops. This week we examine the remaining World Cup groups. In E, will the French smoke the opposition, or just […]
Toronto welcomes Nolberto Solano
On a chilly evening at Lamport Stadium, floodlights cut through the darkening skies and illuminated the light rainfall as Toronto welcomed Peruvian legend Nolberto Solano. Solano played for Boca Juniors – briefly alongside Diego Maradona in 1997 – before racking up over 300 Premier League appearances with Newcastle, […]
How Long Will Pochettino Last?
We all know Daniel Levy’s propensity to fire managers as often as Sven changes jobs. With that in mind, how long do you think Mauricio Pochettino will last at Spurs?
Barcelona vs Atletico: Battle for La Liga
By Andra Nasrie The portable radios were out at the Vicente Calderon, Nou Camp, and Santiago Bernabeu. Worldwide, fans frantically switched back and forth between channels on TV. Not since 2006/2007 has La Liga offered such an unpredictable climax. And on matchday 37, when every match were played […]
David Moyes: Don’t Look Back in Anger
Well, the deed has been done. Manchester Utd have finally sacked David Moyes after 10 months of abject failure. Moyes has overseen losses to the likes of West Brom, Stoke, Newcastle and Olympiakos. He’s overspent on Marouane Fellaini, pissed off Robin Van Persie, been clueless as to how […]
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