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In the North London derby it was Mustafi and Alexis,
Chelsea make West Brom pay and it’ll be the last time Pulis collects his,
Pogba comes back and immediately connects with
Lukaku meanwhile De Bruyne is so good on his left, it’s
almost as good as Salah who scored two and clicked ‘next’
while Moyes can’t save West Ham – who amongst us would have guessed?

Then we turn attention to news on the continent,
Tevecchio resigns – he’s probably incontinent,
Samp beat Juve with so much sauce they’re like a condiment
and Roma beat Lazio as Di Francesco proves highly competent.

We’ll finish off with Spain where Suarez gets his bite back,
and Mumu of the Week reveals which player needs a right smack.

Take off your jacket.